I remember so well the moment I gave my life to Jesus. That is not so strange, because that was only four and a half years ago. What He has done in my life in that short time is extraordinary….
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11
We can sometimes think that we have our lives pretty much together, I thought so too for a long time. Until I gave my life to Jesus, and He completely changed me from the inside out. He gave me new desires, a new heart (Ezekiel 36:26) and new dreams.
“I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.” – Ezekiel 36:26
All these new desires and dreams were at odds with the life I was living at that time. Although I still thought my life was pretty much ‘all set’, I gradually discovered that God had very different ideas for my future.
“But I said to you, “You will possess their land; I will give it to you as an inheritance, a land flowing with milk and honey.” I am the LORD your God, who has set you apart from the nations.” - Leviticus 20:24
Not only did He change me from the inside out, He also slowly broke me free from this life so that I could build a new future with Him as my rock-solid foundation.
It was a process where I only gradually figured out what was going on.
He led me on my way to a land flowing with milk and honey (Exodus 3:8, Numbers 14:8, Leviticus 20:24), a land together with Him where the old has passed away and the new has come.
This was, and still is, a process.
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” – 2 Corinthians 5:17
Bits and pieces
Our whole life we will be shaped and kneaded, just as the Bible also describes how we are the clay and God our potter (Jeremiah 18:1-6, Isaiah 64:8). Looking back on the past four and a half years, I see how God has also kneaded me and my life.
My life, before I knew Jesus, was a hodgepodge of old wounds, bits and pieces from all kinds of periods that flowed into each other, old wounds that I (apparently) still carried, unfinished business and processes that were still ongoing, practical things that I still carried with me from my divorce in the relationship I entered into after this divorce, friends from different periods of my life and the start of my new life with Jesus.
“Yet you, LORD, are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand.” - Isaiah 64:8
For years, my life was a jumble of my childhood-formed character/my divorce/past relationships/my new life with Jesus. Work to be done, God must have thought, LOL.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;” – Proverbs 3:5
Still, I thought I had it all together at that moment, but don’t lean on your own insight, right?😊 (Proverbs 3:5)
I had a relationship, my own house, my job and later my relationship with Jesus was added to it. One big ‘Hallelujah’…. I thought.
Although we can sometimes have an image of our life and our future and how good it may seem at that moment, God really knows what we need and what is good for us. He made us, He knows us better than we know ourselves. He is the One who has placed all our gifts and talents in us.
The more you get to know Jesus, the more you get to know yourself
Living in a broken world clouds our view of all these things. We all have a backpack, pains and traumas, that is inevitable because we live in brokenness. All these things shape and knead you and leave traces in your actions and your character.
The image we have of ourselves is often not the true image. It is what is gradually formed in our lives by the things we experience, what people tell us, or the lies we believe about ourselves. However, the truth about yourself lies in Christ, and as long as you do not know Christ, you do not know the true truth about yourself.
The more you get to know Jesus, the more you get to know yourself. All your gifts and talents lie in Him. And so we can sometimes think what we want for our lives and how we think what is good for us, the true truth about our lives lies in Him.
Seeking and finding Him is therefore also finding yourself.
A never-ending process
Over the past few years, God has been breaking me away from everything I thought was good for me and showing me that it wasn’t all that good after all.
He started working with me; starting with changing all my heart desires, I started loving the things He loves more and hating the things He hates. He shined His light on unprocessed traumas and helped me clear them. Practical matters that were still ongoing from the old life, He cleared for me because it was impossible for me to clear them myself and a miracle of God was needed for that, LOL.
He pulled me out of a relationship that I thought was good for me, but ultimately wasn’t good for me at all. He kept my eyes on Him and I became more and more rooted in His Word, and so, slowly but surely, all the old disappeared. Everything I ever knew from a life before my life with Jesus, disappeared.
“See, I am doing a new thing!” - Isaiah 43:19
Slowly but surely He led me into a whole new life. A life that He had for me with a man that He had chosen for me. I stood there and watched as God truly made everything new (Isaiah 43:19). Bible verses that I had read so often, I now saw unfold over my own life.
Am I there yet? No, definitely not. I believe it is an ongoing process until the day we come home to Him, but we can stand on the promise that He is leading us from glory to glory (2 Corinthians 3:18).
Dare to let go
When you put God first in your life, and truly give Him control over your life, you will see that He truly has the best for you. It is often a process and a challenge for us to let go of control over our lives. In this life on this world, we are simply used to fighting for our own happiness, fighting for a good future for yourself and your children.
But in God’s Kingdom, things just work a little differently, LOL.
I want to encourage you to trust God in this. He has our best interests at heart, and as exciting and scary as it may seem at times, He is more trustworthy with your life and your future than you are. Your life will take shape more and more as you allow Him to pour out His goodness and guidance over it.
He wants to lead you to that abundant life (John 10:10), to a land flowing with milk and honey.
Today is your day to let go and step into His rest, let Him lead, and look forward to the hopeful future He has in store for you!
“I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”
– John 10:10
